{"id":20162,"date":"2012-09-06T12:05:49","date_gmt":"2012-09-06T11:05:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/?p=20162"},"modified":"2012-09-06T12:05:51","modified_gmt":"2012-09-06T11:05:51","slug":"tony-saunders-stroke-survivor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/09\/06\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\/","title":{"rendered":"Tony Saunders: Stroke survivor"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/09\/06\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\/tonysaunders\/\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-20168\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-20168\" src=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/files\/2012\/09\/tonysaunders.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"110\" \/><\/a>One afternoon, 12 years ago, I was doing some gentle exercises in the local gym. I was adjusting the rowing machine when, suddenly, my vision blurred and I fell sideways hitting my head on the floor. The woman on the machine next to me shouted \u201cdon&#8217;t move.\u201d \u201cStupid idea,\u201d I thought \u201cI must get up,\u201d only to find that I was unable to move.<\/p>\n<p>The trip in the ambulance and my passage through casualty to the ward are a blurred memory. I woke in a side room and became aware of a weakness in my right side and being unable to speak. No matter how hard I tried to talk I had lost the ability to do so. I was very distressed and panicky as a result, particularly when I had visitors and was unable to communicate with them.<!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Over the next few days I had regular physiotherapy, and the weakness in my arms and legs gradually improved. Finally I regained my strength and was able to drive again.<\/p>\n<p>My speech, however, was problematic. The speech and language therapist was very helpful, encouraging me, and setting me tasks. What I found worked best was to think about what I wanted to say, practice saying it in my mind, and then to attempt to say it out loud. It was a slow process. One of my colleagues said that I sounded like a Dalek! But with continued practice, and focusing on rhythm and cadence, my speech improved.<\/p>\n<p>After the stroke I felt very tired, and found it easier to let people talk to me\u2014a skill useful in my role as a psychiatrist. My speech was worse when I was tired, anxious, or after a drink. Luckily, I can now drink again without the dreaded effects.<\/p>\n<p>My MRI scan showed a partial dissection of my left internal carotid artery and an infarction of my left middle cerebral artery. It so happened I had been visiting an osteopath for severe headaches, and had had vigorous manipulation of my neck a couple of weeks previously. This probably triggered my stroke.<\/p>\n<p>Through contact with \u201c<a href=\"http:\/\/www.differentstrokes.co.uk\/\">Different strokes<\/a>\u201d and the \u201c<a href=\"http:\/\/www.stroke.org.uk\/\">Stroke association<\/a>,\u201d I learned to think of myself as a stroke \u201csurvivor,\u201d and <em>not<\/em> a stroke \u201cvictim,\u201d which was helpful in regaining my confidence.<\/p>\n<p>I had sessions of acupuncture and reiki. Did they help? At the very least they made me feel that I was doing something active towards my recovery. I have taken omega 3 capsules since my stroke. Many of the parents of children I was treating with ADHD, conduct problems, and dyslexia, swear it makes a difference to their children\u2019s behaviour. I keep taking them, I think that they have made a difference, but it may be just a placebo effect. There could be scope for a research project here.<\/p>\n<p>I was surprisingly desperate to return to work as a child and adolescent psychiatrist, believing I would make better progress and feel more normal. In the event I went back after five months. It was too soon and I struggled at first. I found myself hesitating to talk at meetings, and sometimes stuttering, and envying colleagues I had previously thought rather garrulous.<\/p>\n<p>My recovery has taken place over several years, with the maximum progress being made in the first few weeks and months. I am now left with a small false aneurysm at the level of C1 in my internal carotid artery, and an intermittent problem with my spelling.<\/p>\n<p>I wanted to be able to share my experiences, but at first found that when I gave a vivid account of my stroke I imagined myself back in the ward and becoming anxious, stuttering, and losing my place in my narrative. A form of post traumatic stress disorder I eventually realised. Time and distance from the event has stopped this from happening.<\/p>\n<p>I have given regular talks to medical students about what it was like to have a stroke, what helped in my recovery, and the rare, but significant, risk of neck manipulation. I think that they listen because I am a doctor as well as an ex-patient.<\/p>\n<p>I was asked by Ann Ashburn, professor of rehabilitation at Southampton General Hospital, to talk at the second UK stroke forum. After that I was invited to speak at the launch of the results of the Royal College of Speech and Language Therapists nationwide this took place in the House of Commons. I had an extremely dry mouth during my talk.<\/p>\n<p>I know that I am one of the lucky ones, to have been able to return to work after a stroke. I try to celebrate survival on birthdays, anniversaries, or whenever there is any cause for a celebration.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Tony Saunders<\/strong> is a retired consultant in child and adolescent psychiatry, Southampton child and adolescent mental health services.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One afternoon, 12 years ago, I was doing some gentle exercises in the local gym. I was adjusting the rowing machine when, suddenly, my vision blurred and I fell sideways [&#8230;]<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"btn btn-secondary understrap-read-more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/09\/06\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\/\">More&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[223],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20162","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-guest-bloggers"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Tony Saunders: Stroke survivor - The BMJ<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/09\/06\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Tony Saunders: Stroke survivor - The BMJ\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"One afternoon, 12 years ago, I was doing some gentle exercises in the local gym. I was adjusting the rowing machine when, suddenly, my vision blurred and I fell sideways [...]More...\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/09\/06\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The BMJ\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/bmjdotcom\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-09-06T11:05:49+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2012-09-06T11:05:51+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/files\/2012\/09\/tonysaunders.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"BMJ\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@bmj_latest\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@bmj_latest\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"BMJ\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"BMJ\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/ba3da426ed20e8f1d933ca367d8216fe\"},\"headline\":\"Tony Saunders: Stroke survivor\",\"datePublished\":\"2012-09-06T11:05:49+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2012-09-06T11:05:51+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":805,\"commentCount\":1,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/files\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/tonysaunders.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Guest writers\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs.bmj.com\\\/bmj\\\/2012\\\/09\\\/06\\\/tony-saunders-stroke-survivor\\\/\",\"name\":\"Tony Saunders: Stroke survivor - 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