{"id":19525,"date":"2012-08-16T15:06:41","date_gmt":"2012-08-16T14:06:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/?p=19525"},"modified":"2012-08-20T16:05:47","modified_gmt":"2012-08-20T15:05:47","slug":"richard-smith-and-nataly-kelly-global-attempts-to-avoid-talking-directly-about-death-and-dying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.bmj.com\/bmj\/2012\/08\/16\/richard-smith-and-nataly-kelly-global-attempts-to-avoid-talking-directly-about-death-and-dying\/","title":{"rendered":"Richard Smith and Nataly Kelly: Global attempts to avoid talking directly about death and dying"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Richard\"\"<\/a>
\nEnglish speakers have been very inventive in finding words and phrases that allow them to avoid the words death<\/em> and dying<\/em>, and so we have discovered are people who speak other languages. This seems to be a global phenomenon. We are the kind of people who when we hear somebody say \u201cX has passed away\u201d want to shout \u201cNo X didn’t, X died.\u201d But that’s intolerant, and we want here to praise the global talent for avoiding the dreaded words.<\/p>\n

We were started on our journey by the survey this year<\/a> of British attitudes to death and dying by the Dying Matters Coalition. They surveyed 2000 members of the public and 1000 GPs and found that two thirds of people do not feel comfortable talking\u00a0 to somebody who has a friend or family member who has died. A quarter do not know what to say, and 28% talk about a death only if the bereaved person mentions it first. Yet half of people agree that \u201cIf we felt more comfortable talking about dying and death, people would be less likely to die alone.\u201d<\/p>\n

Almost nine out of 10 GPs agreed that \u201cIf people in Britain felt more comfortable discussing dying, death and bereavement, it would be easier to have our end of life wishes met.\u201d Eight out of ten agreed that \u201cPeople in Britain are uncomfortable discussing dying, death and bereavement.\u201d Perhaps because of this discomfort (but almost unbelievably) a third of GPs have never initiated a conversation with a patient about their end of life wishes. Two thirds of GPs haven’t talked to anybody about their own end of life wishes, and nine out of 10 don’t have any form of living will.<\/p>\n

The survey asked people if they had ever used words or phrases to avoid using the words death<\/em> or dying<\/em> to a bereaved person, and this is where the inventiveness begins. These are the answers with the percentages using them:<\/p>\n

passed away (57%)
\ndeceased (23%)
\nkicked the bucket (20%)
\npassed on (18%)
\ngone to a better place (17%)
\npopped their clogs (17%)
\ndeparted (14%)
\nsix feet under (12%)
\nbrown bread ( 10%)
\npegged it (9%)
\ncroaked (8%)
\nmet their maker (6%)
\nfallen off their perch (4%)
\nturned their toes up (2%)
\ncashed in their chips (2%)
\nsleeping the big sleep (1%)<\/p>\n

Some 5% of people had come up with still other words and phrases, which we weren’t able to track down. Our first thought was that it was hard to imagine that you would avoid upsetting a widow by saying: \u201cI’m sorry, Mrs, to hear that your husband is brown bread,\u201d or \u201ccroaked\u201d or \u201ccashed in his chips.\u201d Some of these words and phrases are clearly gentle euphemisms (passed away, gone to a better place) but some seem rougher than death and dying with clear references to corpses (six feet under, turned their toes up). Despite the British reluctance to talk about death and dying most of these words and phrases would be instantly identifiable to most Brits\u2014even the rhyming slang \u201cbrown bread.\u201d<\/p>\n

Inspired by the British survey, one of us (NK) who is deeply interested in translation and about to publish a book on the subject<\/a> asked professional translators\u00a0 to share words and phrases used in other languages along with their literal\u00a0 translations in English<\/a>. Imagine the challenge of translating for a Spanish speaking doctor a British patient saying \u201cMy wife’s brown bread.\u201d Here’s the collection:<\/p>\n

Afrikaans:
\nBokveld toe\u2014going to the goatfield
\nDie lepel in die dak steek\u2014jabbing the spoon into the ceiling
\nDie emmer skop\u2014to kick the bucket
\nDie tydelike met die ewige verwissel\u2014exchanging the temporary for the everlasting<\/p>\n

Danish:
\nStille tr\u00e6skoene\u2014to leave one’s clogs behind<\/p>\n

Dutch:
\nDe pijp uitgaan\u2014to go out of the pipe
\nDe madeliefjes van onderen bekijken\u2014to look at the daisies from below
\nHet hoekje omgaan\u2014to turn a corner
\nHet tijdelijke met het eeuwige verwisselen\u2014to exchange the temporal for the eternal<\/p>\n

French:
\nAvaler son extrait de naissance\u2014to swallow one’s birth certificate
\nCasser sa pipe\u2014to break one’s pipe
\nManger les pissenlits par la racine\u2014to eat dandelions by the roots
\nPasser l’arme \u00e0 gauche\u2014to pass one’s weapon on one’s left side
\nRendre l’\u00e2me\u2014to give one’s soul back<\/p>\n

German:
\nDas Gras\/die Radieschen) von unten betrachten\u2014to look at the grass\/the radishes from below
\nDas Zeitliche segnen\u2014to bless the time
\nDe Schirm zue tue\u2014to close the umbrella (Swiss German)
\nDen L\u00f6ffel abgeben\u2014to pass on the spoon
\nIn die ewigen Jagdgr\u00fcnde gehen\u2014to go to the eternal hunting grounds
\nIns Gras bei\u00dfen\u2014to bite the grass<\/p>\n

Greek:
\n\u03c4\u03af\u03bd\u03b1\u03be\u03b5 \u03c4\u03b1 \u03c0\u03ad\u03c4\u03b1\u03bb\u03b1\u2014to cast the petals<\/p>\n

Hebrew:
\n\u05de\u05e8\u05d9\u05d7 \u05d0\u05ea \u05d4\u05e4\u05e8\u05d7\u05d9\u05dd \u05de\u05dc\u05de\u05d8\u05d4\u2014to smell the flowers from below
\n\u05d9\u05e8\u05d3 \u05d3\u05d5\u05de\u05d4\u2014descend to the afterworld \/ Dumah or Dumah descended (guardian angel of the dead in Talmudic folklore).
\n\u05e9\u05db\u05d1\u05d4 \u05e2\u05dd \u05d0\u05d1\u05d5\u05ea\u05d9\u05d4\u2014lying with their ancestors
\n\u05d4\u05d7\u05d6\u05d9\u05e8 \u05e0\u05e9\u05de\u05ea\u05d5 \u05dc\u05d1\u05d5\u05e8\u05d0\u05d5\u2014his soul has returned to his maker<\/p>\n

Hungarian:
\nAlulr\u00f3l szagolja az iboly\u00e1t\u2014to smell the violets from below
\nBeadja a kulcsot\u2014to hand in the key
\nBedobja a t\u00f6r\u00fclk\u00f6z\u0151t\u2014to throw in the towel
\nBefejezi f\u00f6ldi p\u00e1lyafut\u00e1s\u00e1t\u2014to finish one’s worldly career
\nCs\u00f3kot v\u00e1lt a hal\u00e1llal\u2014to exchange kisses with death
\nElt\u00e1vozik az \u00f6r\u00f6k vad\u00e1szmez\u0151kre\u2014to leave for the eternal hunting fields
\nElviszi a kasz\u00e1s\u2014to be taken by the grim reaper
\nFeldobja a talp\u00e1t\/bakancs\u00e1t\u2014to kick one’s feet\/boots up in the air
\nFelfordul\u2014to turn belly-up
\nF\u0171be harap\u2014to bite the grass
\nItthagyja az \u00e1rny\u00e9kvil\u00e1got\u2014to leave this shadow world
\nJobbl\u00e9tre szender\u00fcl\u2014to fall asleep to a better life
\nKileheli a lelk\u00e9t\u2014to exhale one’s soul
\nMag\u00e1hoz sz\u00f3l\u00edtja az \u00far\u2014to be summoned by the Lord
\n\u00d6r\u00f6k \u00e1lomba mer\u00fcl\u2014to fall into an eternal dream
\nOtthagyja a fog\u00e1t\u2014to leave one’s teeth
\nVisszaadja a lelk\u00e9t a Teremt\u0151nek\u2014to return one’s soul to the Maker<\/p>\n

Irish:
\nBa l\u00e1 maith dh\u00f3 \u00e9\u2014it was a good day for him
\nGo nd\u00e9ana Dia gr\u00e1sta\/ tr\u00f3caire air\u2014may God be merciful (said after mentioning somebody who has died)
\nImithe ar shl\u00ed na f\u00edrinne\u2014gone on the path of truth<\/p>\n

Italian:
\nCadere stecchito\u2014to drop dead (stecchito, from stecco or stick, refers to the stiffness of a dead body)
\nSvegliarsi sotto a un cipresso\u2014to wake up under a cypress
\nStirare le zampe\u2014to stretch (out) one’s legs\/paws
\nTirare le cuoia\u2014to pull the leathers<\/p>\n

Spanish:
\nCantar el Manisero\u2014to sing El Manisero (El Manisero is a song, and the title literally means \u201cthe peanut vendor\u201d) (Cuban Spanish)
\nCriar malvas\u2014to grow daisies
\nDarle la pat\u00e1 (patada) a la lata\u2014to kick the can (Cuban Spanish)
\nEstirar la pata\u2014to stretch your leg
\nGuardar el carro\u2014to put the car away (Cuban Spanish)
\nIrse al 1900\u2014to go to 1900 (only in the municipality of Regla, after the year of foundation of the cemetery that appears on the fa\u00e7ade) (Cuban Spanish)
\nIrse de gira\u2014to go on a tour, especially for artists (Argentine Spanish)
\nPasar a mejor vida\u2014to pass to a better life
\nMudarse al reparto Bocarriba\u2014moving to a face up neighbourhood\u2014that is, the graveyard (Cuban Spanish)<\/p>\n

Polish:
\nKopn\u0105\u0107 w kalendarz\u2014to kick the calendar
\nPowi\u0119kszy\u0142 grono anio\u0142k\u00f3w\u2014joined the host of little angels (about a child\u2019s death)
\nW\u0105cha\u0107 kwiatki od spodu\u2014to smell flowers from below
\nWyci\u0105gn\u0105\u0107 nogi (wyci\u0105gn\u0105\u0107 kopyta)\u2014to stretch your legs (or hooves)<\/p>\n

Portuguese:
\nBater as botas\u2014to beat the boots one against the other
\nDormir para sempre\u2014to sleep forever
\nEncontrar Deus\u2014to meet God
\nEsticar o pernil\u2014to stretch the leg
\nImpacotar\u2014to get packed*
\nIr fazer tijolo\u2014to produce bricks
\nIr desta para melhor\u2014to go from this one to a better one
\nIr para o andar de cima\u2014to go upstairs
\nIr para os anjinhos\u2014to go to the little angels
\nN\u00e3o comer manga na pr\u00f3xima esta\u00e7\u00e3o\u2014to not eat mangos next season
\nPartir para uma vida melhor\u2014to start a better life
\nVestir pijama de madeira\u2014to wear wooden pajamas<\/p>\n

Russian:
\n\u043e\u0442\u043a\u0438\u043d\u0443\u0442\u044c \u043a\u043e\u043f\u044b\u0442\u0430\u00a0 (ot’kinut ko’pyta)\u2014to cast away one’s hooves<\/p>\n

Romanian:
\nA da coltul\u2014to turn at the corner
\nA da ortu popii\u2014to pay the “ort” to the priest (Ort is a coin\/currency paid to the priest who gave the church service at a funeral)<\/p>\n

Perhaps the first thing to strike an English speaker is that the foreign phrases seem more poetic. That is perhaps because they are fresh; they are not familiar clich\u00e9s, although they presumably are to those who speak the languages. The religious component is stronger in some languages\u2014for example, Irish\u2014reflecting that Britain is a post-religious society. Lying under the flowers, radishes, or dandelions seems common in many languages, and for some reason \u201cpushing up the daisies\u201d didn’t make it into the English list. Stretching and turning up your toes, paws, or hooves is common, perhaps suggesting that humans have more in common with animals than we might like to think \u2013 at least, in death.<\/p>\n

Cuban Spanish perhaps takes the prize for the most colourful, and mudarse al reparto Bocarriba<\/em> (moving to a face up neighbourhood\u2014that is, the graveyard) makes us laugh. The Irish language offers the most positive outlook on death, and ba l\u00e1 maith dh\u00f3 \u00e9<\/em> (it was a good day for him) is our favourite phrase. However, a national survey in Ireland<\/a>\u2014primarily of people with English as their mother tongue\u2014revealed difficulties dealing with death that are similar to the British survey findings.<\/p>\n

Just as in English not all of these words and phrases are euphemisms. They are alternate ways of referring to death, but the word death in each culture does not necessarily have the negative connotations it has in English. Not all of these phrases deliver the same effect\u2014some could be offensive, some are respectful, others are light-hearted.<\/p>\n

Why should doctors care about any of this? They should be aware that views of death vary drastically from one culture to another. In some cultures, it is horrific for a family member to hear something like “he has 2 or 3 months to live.” To say this is akin to tempting fate, being blasphemous, or simply stating something unspeakable. (This is a common view in some Asian, African, and Native American cultures.)<\/p>\n

A very common thing interpreters deal with when interpreting for Western doctors is when a doctor explains the risks of a certain procedure. If death is on the list of risks, some patients will go into a panic when hearing about it. In some cases, they will actually say, “Why is the doctor telling me this? Does s\/he want me to die?” It’s as if talking about it is wishing it upon the patient. In some cases, they feel that if the doctor is “good,” they will simply focus on the more likely outcomes, not occupy their minds with the minute chance of a negative one.<\/p>\n

In many Western countries doctors are legally obliged or expected to disclose all risks of surgery to patients both verbally and in writing in order to ensure they understand the risks. However, in many countries of foreign patients, the opposite is true and it is taboo to discuss the risks. Translation is not just a matter of words but also of cultures.<\/p>\n

We hope that readers who speak different languages and come from different cultures will add to our list by submitting comments below. We will be particularly grateful for examples from African, Asian, and indigenous languages.<\/p>\n

We thank the many translators who have contributed to this collection.<\/p>\n

* As has been pointed out by people in the comments to this blog. “Impacotar” should read “empacotar.”<\/p>\n

Competing interest<\/strong>: NK is the chief research officer at Common Sense Advisory, an independent market research firm dedicated to language services and technology. Her book, Found in Translation: How Language Shapes Our Lives and Transforms the World, will be published by Perigee\/Penguin USA in October.<\/em><\/p>\n

Nataly Kelly<\/strong> is the chief research officer at Common Sense Advisory<\/a>, an independent research firm that focuses on language services and business globalization. Her latest book is <\/em>Found in Translation: How Language Shapes Our Lives and Transforms the World<\/a> (Perigee\/Penguin USA).<\/em><\/p>\n

Richard Smith<\/strong> was the editor of the BMJ until 2004 and is director of the United Health Group’s chronic disease initiative.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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